GMIM: Toilet covers, Kyrie Irving, and Chipotle rats

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Is using a toilet seat cover a soft move?

In the 9 o’ clock hour at work, I usually take care of some business in my office. If I’m lucky enough, I can snag the handicap private bathroom, which features toilet seat covers. We’ve all seen them, the thinner-than-paper toilet seat shaped cover that prevents your cheeks from touching the seat.

My question is this: am I a coward for using them when I can? I’m not the type of person to use a cover or build a nest every time I use a public restroom. If it’s a grimy place or if something seems off, I’m cushioning my butt. Otherwise, I have no problem going unprotected.

What I find so odd about this topic is the shaming towards it. Using the bathroom was once the sacred place of privacy for us; we could escape the world and relax in a judgement free zone. But it seems more often than not, people are judgmental towards those using covers or building a nest. We know when it’s happening, too. The sound of rolling toilet paper echoes throughout the restroom before the individual sits. Three separate tears rip through the air and these sheets form a human nest for the person’s final resting spot. Why must we judge when this happens, as if these architects of paper thrown covers are a burden to our society? When men do this, others will tear down his masculinity and look upon him as a mere mortal child.

Life pro tip: if you go into a public restroom in the morning or night and the seat is up, it most likely was just cleaned. In those cases, you almost HAVE to go bare ass.

So I’ll let you the people decide if I’m either a regular person for doing this, or a soft snowflake who can’t handle a few germs.

P.S.,  The rug toilet seat covers for homes are a good idea on the surface (no pun intended), but a complete psycho move to actually own. Just a disgusting way to gather butt hair, sweat, and anything else left behind.

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Kyrie Irving wants a trade; will GM LeBron James make the move?

Big story came out over the weekend concerning Cavaliers star Kyrie Irving wanting out of Cleveland. He’s apparently tired of living in LeBron James’ shadow and wants to be the man, the head honcho, and/or the dude.

This creates an interesting situation for James, who we all know is the owner, president, general manager, coach, assistant coach (not that far off), captain, trainer, and demigod of the Cleveland Cavaliers. Where will James trade Kyrie? Who is he calling around the league? Will James acquire a player that fits into his coaching system? It’s a big off-season for James to prove he can indeed flex his front office muscles.

If GM LeBron was smart (which he is, because he’s a business man), he’d shop Irving to the Lakers. Now you may be asking, “Zach, why would GM LeBron ship Irving to Los Angeles? They have Lonzo Ball?” Sure, but Lonzo can’t shoot. At all. He has been and always will be the pass-first point guard. With Ball at the 1, Irving gets a spot at the 2. LeBron will not wave his no-trade clause for the 2017-2018 season, but he could opt-out before the 18-19 season, which would be essentially quitting on himself.

This sets up a perfect situation for James; Irving plays in L.A. for two season and improves the team with Ball, Cleveland starts to fall apart, and then James is forced to ditch Cleveland yet again for an up-and-coming team poised for a championship. It wouldn’t be the first time James left Cleveland for a team featuring a pair of first round picks. Just like Miami, one of those players has experience carrying his team to a championship (cough Irving cough).

Hot take level: 2 out of 5 fire emojis

Disclaimer: The narrative of LeBron being the coach and GM has always annoyed me. You probably knew this already by my sarcastic blogs about LeBron’s GM status. I got into a Twitter argument (much drama, very wow) over this concept and was repeatedly told that he is in fact the GM because he gets what he wants. There’s a difference between being a decision maker and an influence, and LeBron James is a massive influence to the Cleveland Cavaliers. If James wants to play with a talented big man, of course the front office will seek trades or sign a player. If James isn’t happy with a coach, of course the front office will fire his ass (R.I.P. David Blatt). It doesn’t take a smart person to understand that a team will cater to not only the best player on the team, but the best on the planet.

To label LeBron James as the “general manager” of the Cavaliers is asinine, especially only when things go right. When the Cavs acquire players like Kevin Love, ESPN and other talking heads will say, “there’s LeBron the GM getting his players!” Or when the team is on a streak after LeBron yells at his coach, the narrative is, “LeBron is the coach of the Cavs and we are seeing his success play out.”  So where is the criticism when things go wrong? Isn’t it GM LeBron’s fault that Irving wants a trade? Where was the talk about LeBron’s poor coaching ability when they fell to the Warriors in five games?

No one can argue against LeBron James being the most dominant player and most influential presence in the NBA, but I doubt anyone was calling Larry Bird, Michael Jordan, or any of the other greats the “general managers” of their respective teams.

It’s now raining rats in Chipotle

[Source] – If Chipotle’s ongoing health and PR woes haven’t been enough to turn you off of your weekly burrito bowl, perhaps this will: rodents spontaneously started to fall from the ceiling in a Chipotle Mexican Grill in Dallas, Texas.

Customers were eating during the restaurant’s lunch rush, enjoying their guac, when the incident occurred. Some managed to take footage of the rats as they scampered around the place.

“If we would have been sitting at the table next to that it definitely would have fell on top of our food because it was literally right there,” Daniela Ornelas told NBC DFW, adding, “I just kept wondering what it was, and I kept looking around until I looked at the floor, and I saw three rats, and I ran.”

Another week, another Chipotle under fire for some sort of health violation. Last week it was the norovirus in Virginia, now it’s raining rats in Texas. Between this and the famous e-coli outbreak last year, Chipotle is catching L’s left and right. Its stock and value continues to drop, yet people will continue to eat their food. And it’s not a few people still lingering, locations are still packed during lunch hours.

So the question in all of this is, who is more invincible: Chipotle or Donald Trump? We are constantly getting news about these two giants enduring troubles and controversies, yet they’re still on top in their respective fields. Russia? No problem. Food-borne illness? Business as usual. Sexist comments? Who cares. Egyptian plague of raining rats? Carry on, folks.

If we’re taking bets on what will end first, rodent & disease infested restaurants or the Trump presidency, it’s a toss-up at this point. Neither of them have seemed to falter in the past two years, so it’s going to take a lot more than healthcare and rats to bring down either.

Have any stories to share? Suggestions? Feedback? Send them to ZacharyAdamGray@gmail.com or Tweet me @ZacharyAdamGray

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