Welcome to another installment of Good Mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…
Weather: Cold. Really cold.
Traffic: Road were ok, but classic MBTA delays
Breakfast: Turkey sausage on an English and an XL Dunks that doesn’t taste great
Zach arrival time: Later than I wanted
Monday Mourning Metaphor
All last week was a Monday
“Zach, Zach… where was the blog last week? We missed you!”
Yes, I know. Last weekend had some stuff going on and then the week just took over, so apologies for ruining your downtime at work.
Just the start of last week was something special. First off, it snowed. Nothing better than snow twice in a week to start the month of April. After sitting through traffic, I finally wait at the T stop and of course, it’s absolutely packed. Remember folks, for every inch of snow, the T get delayed 20 minutes.
As I wait in the snow like an abandoned dog in the middle of Siberia, I watch three fully-packed trains pass through the station. I eventually squeezed onto the fourth.
Following the thrill ride to Downtown Crossing, I wobbled my sorry self to the office, where I proceeded to somehow roll my ankle pulling out my office chair, further proving I am un-athletic and should avoid any basketball court going forward. Oh, and I spilled my coffee.
This week’s start is slightly better. First, I didn’t roll my ankle, which is a huge plus. But, it was cold as shit again and the train was once again, super delayed. So that was fun.
We’re making progress, folks. I’m told Spring is around the corner, but I won’t feel safe until July. Happy Monday, friends.
Starbucks causes cancer (allegedly in California)
[Source: Reuters] – Starbucks Corp and other coffee sellers must put a cancer warning on coffee sold in California, a Los Angeles judge has ruled, possibly exposing the companies to millions of dollars in fines.
A little-known not-for-profit group sued some 90 coffee retailers, including Starbucks, on grounds they were violating a California law requiring companies to warn consumers of chemicals in their products that could cause cancer.
One of those chemicals is acrylamide, a byproduct of roasting coffee beans that is present in high levels in brewed coffee.
Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Elihu Berle said in a decision dated Wednesday that Starbucks and other companies had failed to show there was no significant risk from a carcinogen produced in the coffee roasting process, court documents showed.
Another L handed to Starbucks. Incredible how ever since I’ve boycotted these capitalist pigs, they’ve been suffering with negative story after another. And now we find out their coffee can (allegedly) kill you… in California.
Sure, there’s numerous studies about the benefits of coffee and this is only taking place in California, but one state saying your coffee is just as deplorable as big tobacco is more of a victory than no states stating the obvious.
The big revelation from this story is all it took was some little not-for-profit group of hippies to force California-based Starbucks into admitting they kill people. This has to be a gateway into me exposing Starbucks as bigots in Massachusetts, right? I mean, why else wouldn’t they make me a Unicorn Frappuccino? Well folks, it’s just as clear as their coffee causing cancer: they hate short & stout people. I don’t fit the look of a “Starbucks customer.” All I need is a few others to join me and soon every cup of Starbucks in Massachusetts will be forced to feature a label saying “WARNING: This product was created on the grounds of both coffee and discrimination. Drink at your own risk.”
Things are brewing, and it certainly isn’t their coffee.
Gym Update: I strained my neck doing pull-ups
As I’ve said previously, I won’t turn this into a fitness or life betterment blog. Hell, the name of this blog is Good Mourning, It’s Monday. But if something happens at the gym that’s worth showcasing, I’ll share it. And I certainly don’t mean my physique, because that is certainly not interesting.
So I’ve been going to a few classes a week thus far at this new gym. Some yoga, little circuit, even thru in a boxing class, you know… a variety of things. But the other day I did a weight room class and somehow tweaked my neck doing pull-ups. First off, I didn’t even know this was possible, given I’m not really sure what muscles are being used in a pull-up. I did manage to go back to the gym after doing this, but it’s been almost a week and waking up has been interesting to say the least.
Now I’m curious to see how I can pull my hamstring doing pushups, or dislocate my shoulder in yoga. It seems like anything is possible, and I’m not getting any younger.
Wednesday is a big day: I have my hour-long personal fitness evaluation. I’ll blog an entire recap to reveal how out of shape I am. More to come!
P.S.: If this guy can win The Masters…
…then anything is possible.
Song of the Week
We all have a song that we really enjoy listening to, regardless of how many times it’s overplayed on the radio. That song for me is Drake’s “God’s Plan.” Straight fire out the car speakers every time it plays.
Since I’ve refused to pay for Spotify, I pull up the old YouTube and play that and some other songs on occasion. But when searching God’s Plan, there’s a massive number of parody songs, all of which are incredibly cringe-worthy. So I went down a YouTube rabbit hole of shitty God’s Plan parody songs. Then again, pretty much every parody song is garbage. So, enjoy this collection of crap.
Have any stories to share? Suggestions? Feedback? Send them to ZacharyAdamGray@gmail.com or tweet me @ZacharyAdamGray