Welcome to another installment of Good Mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…
Weather: On the cooler side
Traffic: I didn’t scream at anyone, so that was good
Breakfast: Glazed stick and small black coffee
Zach arrival time: Not late, I think
Monday Mourning Metaphor
Dunkin Donuts debuts Cosmic Coolatta, attempt to win my heart over
[Source] – Dunkin’ Donuts is launching a galaxy-inspired menu today full of two new Coolattas blended to look like nebulas and a donut covered in multi-colored popping candy that sounds truly out of this world.
Underneath, the Comet Candy Donut is a plain yeast donut with white icing but on top you’ll find an explosion of blue, purple and pink popping candy that taste like cotton candy.
In addition to the comet candy donut, there’s not just one, but two (!!!) different Cosmic Coolattas being released today. Each are a blend of two different flavors swirled together to create a nebula-like effect.
The Cosmic Cotton Candy Coolatta is a brand-new cotton candy flavored Coolatta topped off with Blue Raspberry, while the Cosmic Pineapple Coolatta is a blend of a new pineapple flavor with blue raspberry.
As a bonus, all small Coolattas in any flavor — including the new cotton candy and pineapple flavors—will be just $2 through May 27.
If you’ve been reading this blog on a regular basis, you’d know by now that I despise Starbucks and everything they stand for (bigotry, racism, capitalism, communism, slimeballery, etc). This hate I have doesn’t exactly mean I’m Team Dunkin, but this latest move might just reel me in like the stupid fish I am.
Isn’t it convenient that a week after I celebrate a full year without Starbucks that Dunkin releases a drink to directly compete with the Unicorn Frappiccino? Come on, the “Cosmic Coolatta?” You don’t make a blue and pink frozen drink, call it cosmic, and not consider my boycott.
I appreciate the effort, Dunkin. I really do. But I can already tell this is going to taste like garbage. But t’s not your fault. You tried your best and that’s all I can ask for. But don’t try to kiss up to me knowing I’m avoiding Starbucks. Shooters shoot, but don’t be desperate.
With that said, Cosmic Coolatta review coming next week.
Movie review: Isle of Dogs
So Sunday night, my lovely lady and I went on our 7th first date. What is this you ask? Fellas, listen up. You might want to take notes on how to be a goddamn gentleman.
Every year, I take Lynds out to the same restaurant, coffee shop, and movie theater in that order, just like we did on our very first date. Guys, show your woman that you do in fact remember a thing or two and somewhere inside that sad sack of man is a soft side.
Anywho, point of this section is for the movie we saw: Isle of Dogs. Typically we watch a crappy movie every year (as tradition), but once I saw the trailer, I knew I had to see it.
If you watched the trailer, then you get the idea. It’s the future, mayor hates dogs, sends them to trash island, boy tries to find dog. Simple enough. Oh, and the dogs speak (just for the audience).
Isle of Dogs is incredibly impressive visually. The stop-action animation is super smooth and beautifully done. You can learn all about it below…
The storyline in hindsight is predictable, but the way it is told is entertaining and leaves you wanting to know more as the story progresses. Each dog has his or her own personality, quirks, and traits that make it easy to connect to each one.
Isle of Dogs is funny, yet heartbreaking; cute yet cruel. It tugs are your emotions easily because it looks like an innocent children’s movie, but is much deeper.
This will easily be nominated for best animated feature come Oscar season, and rightfully so. I’m no movie buff or nerd, so I can’t say whether or not it will win. But I can easily say that Isle of Dogs will be one of my favorite movies of 2018, and I can’t wait to watch it again.
Zach’s rating: 5 out of 5 puppy snaps
Hot take: Carvel Ice Cream cake is overrated
Fellas, I hope you took notes, because the blog moves on. Later in our date night, we were discussing my birthday. (Side note: Venmo birthday donations are still being accepted at this time @zacharyadamgray). My lovely lady asked what kind of cake I wanted, but I was sure what to get. I’m not a sweets guy. Never been big into candy, but I’ll have cake, ice cream, and some good dark chocolate everyone in a while. You know, like a pregnant woman.
During our cake conversation, she mentioned ice cream cake, to which I said ice cream cake is terrible. She wasn’t happy.
Listen, the concept is great: combine the two things people eat for dessert on birthdays. But it doesn’t taste great. First off, the icing is oddly soggy. Think about that: how the hell can icing get soggy? Then the ice cream itself is that generic vanilla/chocolate that lacks flavor because it’s been sitting in the freezer soaked in preservatives. Finally, the worst part: the crunchies. Yup, I went there. I think Lyndsey almost broke up with me when I said the middle crunchies were the worst part. Listen Carvel, you ain’t Oreo. Never will be no matter how hard you try. The taste and texture are comparable to road side asphalt crumbles.
If a birthday party has ice cream cake, I’ll still eat it. I’m not an asshole. But just know deep down inside my heart (and stomach) that I’m not enjoying that cube of frozen mush. No sir.
So, we agreed to disagree, and she’ll be getting me a black cow cake. Can’t wait.
(Once again, Venmo donations are wide open: @zacharyadamgray)
Song of the week
When you got Cinco de Mayo and your birthday coming up…
Have any stories to share? Suggestions? Feedback? Send them to ZacharyAdamGray@gmail.com or tweet me @ZacharyAdamGray