A historic achievement: 100 mornings without Starbucks

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During mankind’s biggest events throughout history, we tend to ask ourselves and others where we were at that moment. I was in my friend’s dorm room when President Obama announced that Osama Bin Laden was killed. Last year, I watched the Cubs win its first World Series in over 100 years in my girlfriend’s living room. When Harry Potter and the Cursed Child was published last year, I was most likely napping because I don’t give a damn about those wizarding nerds. Today is one of those days: I’ve gone 100 mornings without Starbucks.

April 23 was supposed to be a normal Sunday in the office. It was also the final day of Starbucks week-long promotion of the Unicorn Frappuccino. I needed to try this cup of frozen fairy vomit just to say I did in fact have one. The ‘Bucks below my office had just opened up, so I was sure to get a fresh blend of the good stuff. Problem was, they “ran out” of the ingredients. Reasonable, sure, but disappointing nonetheless. But lo and behold, not even 10 minutes later, a coworker comes in the office with a Unicorn Frappuccino…from the Starbucks downstairs. From that moment on, I knew it was my calling to declare war on those Seattle-based capitalists slime-pigs. Continue reading

GMIM: The Carlton, Dunkirk, and shopping scams

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Is The Carlton the greatest dance in television history?

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So the other night, the girlfriend and I had the TV on prior to going na-nights. She prefers to fall asleep with it on, while I would rather not burn my eyeballs out before falling asleep. I usually lose that battle, but I promise you, I will win the war.

Anywho, we throw on Nick at Nite* and playing is Fresh Prince. We jump in the middle of Season 2, Episode 24, a.k.a. “Striptease for Two” from May 4, 1992 to see Alfonso Ribeiro on stage in front of a large number of middle-aged women. He gets into a Chippendale’s-esque routine that is cut short by Ribeiro’s TV mom. Kicking off the routine, however is the familiar swaying of his arms left to right and right to left, with the rest of his body following along. Yes, it’s Carlton Banks’ signature dance, simply known as “The Carlton.” Continue reading

GMIM: Toilet covers, Kyrie Irving, and Chipotle rats

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Is using a toilet seat cover a soft move?

In the 9 o’ clock hour at work, I usually take care of some business in my office. If I’m lucky enough, I can snag the handicap private bathroom, which features toilet seat covers. We’ve all seen them, the thinner-than-paper toilet seat shaped cover that prevents your cheeks from touching the seat.

My question is this: am I a coward for using them when I can? I’m not the type of person to use a cover or build a nest every time I use a public restroom. If it’s a grimy place or if something seems off, I’m cushioning my butt. Otherwise, I have no problem going unprotected. Continue reading

GMIM: Lights, Eyes, and Lists

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

(Unsuccessfully) Chasing the Northern Lights

 

You know the saying, “unless it’s absolutely guaranteed, don’t do it because you’ll look like a dummy”? Well, neither do I, but I should’ve used that advice last night.

So the nerds over at the National Weather Service reported a coronal mass ejection from the sun prior to the weekend. Basically, something on the sun exploded, shot plasma laser beam stuff towards Earth, and took a couple of days to arrive. If you want to act like you understand it, check out the Space Weather Conditions website. The result of this is an aurora in the sky, otherwise known as the Northern Lights.

After the weather folks reported it, local media stretching from the Midwest to New England ran with it and slapped it all over social media, evening news reports, and the front pages of their websites. The story had gone from “sun explosion plus certain weather conditions on Earth equals visual phenomenon” to “HOLY SHIT,, FOLKSS WE’rE GONNA SEE LIGHTS IN THE SKY!!” Continue reading

GMIM: Hot-Take Monday, Tennis Edition

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

WARNING: THIS WEEK’S BLOG WILL FEATURE HOT-FIRE-FLAMES TAKES. THESE ARE OPINIONS (OR MAYBE FACTS) THAT’LL BE SURE TO GET YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS CHATTING IT UP AROUND THE WATER COOLER. MAKE SURE YOU ARE SEATED FOR THE DURATION OF YOUR READING PERIOD.

Is Wimbledon’s dress code racist against the colorblind and thicc people?

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It’s MLB’s All-Star week, which means the American sporting world has come to a halt. It’s especially dead this year since the All-Star game means nothing now thanks to Commissioner Rob Manfred’s choice to take away the whole “winner is the home team in the World Series and it means something now, guys” aspect. First he takes steroids away, then chewing tobacco is banned at parks, and now teams lose without consequence? Pretty soon he’ll be making players line up after games to give opponents high-fives and say “good game.” If we start praising Corey Kluber for shaking Aaron Judge’s hand after giving up a pair of bombs, then I guess we’ll have to be critical towards Cherokees for not thanking Andrew Jackson.

So as America’s Past-time takes a timeout, we have an opportunity to watch our friends across the pond scream and moan their way towards winning a plate and centerpiece. Yup, I’m talking about Wimbledon.

Most people covering the event will say the main story lines are Roger Federer’s quest to win yet again, Novak Djokovic’s attempt to be liked more than Roger, Rafael Nadal’s strategy to convince us he’s good at tennis when not playing on clay, Andy Murray’s journey towards being relevant in his own country, Serena Williams being pregnant, or Venus Williams being the best Williams sister in the tournament.

But the real story this year, and every year since 1877, is Wimbledon’s offensive dress code: players must wear all white. Continue reading

Overused athlete clichés fans use

Woah, Zach decided to write a blog more than once a week? Yeah, I did, so shut up and read.

The Boston Celtics pulled off a July 4th miracle of sorts and signed free agent Gordon Hayward. If you don’t know him, he’s the dude that almost hit the greatest shot in basketball history:

…and once looked like this: Continue reading

GMIM: I got blocked on Twitter

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

I triggered someone on Twitter

It’s a lovely Monday morning. Birds chirping, sun beaming, and I’m inside working from home. It’s ok, folks, I’m good. Got to earn that cheddar somehow.

I open all my work tabs and also hop on Twitter and see a report that Pete Frates, the inspiration of the ice bucket challenge, had died. Frates became a world-wide figure after starting the ice bucket challenge to raise money for ALS research.

Turns out, the report was false. Mike Barnicle, who was fired from The Boston Globe, had tweeted out this morning that Frates had passed. He later deleted the tweet and said a family friend told him the false news (way to admit you messed up). Just some great journalistic reporting by not reaching out to the family, hospital, or anyone else to confirm the story.

Though Frates was known across the country, he was beloved in the Boston area. So of course, everyone is reacting with “RIP Pete Frates” or “It was great to know him,” and so on. Thankfully, Steve Buckley of the Boston Herald came out and reported the Barnicle tweet was false. Continue reading

GMIM: The city (still) sucks, NBA Draft, and teeth

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

The city sucks, part 153

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Over the weekend I went to a couple of graduation and birthday parties that consisted of eating food, drinking some drinks, and talking about whatever people decide to ask me. Of course, whenever you’re talking to someone you don’t know or talk to all too often, the universal topic to discuss is work. Why is it when people gather at a party to get away from work we insist on talking about our jobs?

Anywho, I get asked about my job in Boston and I cover the basics as everyone does. “The office is here, my position is this, I’ve been there since then, yes I like it.” We all usually get the typical response that goes something like, “Oh that’s great!” or “That’ll be good for the resume,” or maybe “Wow, you’re doing great.” Ya ya, sure sure.

But I wasn’t expecting the response I got Saturday. “I love the city, it’s great. It feels so alive, everyone is busy doing something. It motivates me and put me in a good mood.” Continue reading

GMIM: Celtics and manicures

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Hot take Monday: Is Danny Ainge the greatest B.S. artist in sports?

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If you somehow haven’t been following the recent NBA news, Celtics general manager Danny Ainge has agreed to trade away Boston’s first ever #1 overall pick to division foe Philadelphia for the Sixers’ #3 pick and another future 1st round pick. I won’t get into the nitty-gritty of the deal, but the overall consensus so far is if there are no other deals or plans past this, the Celtics absolutely screwed themselves. It was expected that the Celtics would draft Markelle Fultz in the top spot, but now it’s looking more like Josh Jackson out of Kansas.

Through his tenure in the Celtics front office, Ainge has been the center of both praise and criticism from Boston fans, aka Green Teamers. His trades have resulted in great success, while other moves have many scratching their heads.

This leads us to the ultimate question: is Danny Ainge the greatest bullshit artist in sports right now? Continue reading

GMIM: Words

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Today’s edition of Good mourning, it’s Monday! will dive into the very thing that makes up these blogs: words. It’ll be a bit of a history lesson and of course, a complaint for another glorious Monday. Let’s get to it, folks. Continue reading

GMIM: Sinuses and Chocolate Guys

 

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Contrary to popular belief, a sinus infection is not fun

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This past week and a half has been quite a doozy for yours truly. It started back on Friday, May 26 in the morning when I was vomiting ever so gracefully in the bathroom of a classy Boston hotel room. Depending on how bad you puke, it can either be a quick experience that helps you feel better or a loud and violent Exorcist-like experience. I was the latter of the two, plus utilizing my nostrils.

When heading home, I found myself constantly blowing my nose in a futile attempt to clear my nasal passages. See folks, if you don’t properly puke simply back out of your mouth and you use your nose like an idiot, you end up with crap up in your sinuses that should be in your lower intestine a few hours later. I didn’t know it until a few days later, but it was a big ol’ sinus infection. Continue reading

GMIM: Starbucks, Big Ballers, and the NHL/NBA Finals

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Starbucks baristas slam executives, as the Zach Gray unicorn frappuccino curse rolls on

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[Source: Yahoo!] – Starbucks baristas say that a recent initiative to improve customer service proves how out-of-touch the company’s executives are with what’s really going on in stores. 

In interviews with more than a dozen current and former Starbucks workers, employees told Business Insider that serious adjustments need to be made if the company wants to grow sales and maintain its positive, progressive reputation. 

“The perception isn’t the reality,” one Chicago barista told Business Insider. “Most people see Starbucks as a well-run operation, but being on the inside, I’ve found many flaws and wonder how this place makes money.”

Well, well, well, if it isn’t another negative story about the almighty Starbucks. We all know by now that I’m 30+ days into my boycott of the coffee chain. It seems ever since it started, there have been mishaps and negative stories slowly building. In the middle of May, Starbucks shops across the country experienced software glitches with their registers, causing them to go offline for several hours. This resulted in thousands of closed stores, cash-only purchases, or even shops giving away free coffee. Continue reading

GMIM: Celtics, early mornings, and criminals

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Celtics stun Cavs, time to fire up the hot takes!

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If you didn’t watch the Celtics take down the Cavaliers last night, you missed some great playoff basketball. Boston, down by 21 in the third, managed to scrap together a comeback and ultimately win thanks to an Avery Bradley 3-pointer with 0.1 seconds remaining. Final score: 111-108, Boston wins.

But today isn’t about a great win. Nope, it’s all about Hot Take City. Let’s take a drive over to Mayor Skip Bayless’s town and see what’s in store: Continue reading

GMIM: Breast feeding, basketball, and my health

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Australian Senator Becomes First-Ever to Breastfeed in Parliament

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[Source: Motto] – Australian Senator Larissa Waters made history Tuesday as the first person to breastfeed in her country’s Parliament. Waters, the co-leader of the left-wing Greens party, returned from a 10-week-long maternity leave with her newborn daughter, Alia Joy, and nursed her during a vote. The parliamentarian was instrumental in passing a rule last year that allowed for members to breastfeed in the senate chambers, according to The Courier Mail. Still, Waters was surprised to receive so much attention.

What a hardo, amirite??

Stories like this are exactly the type of click bait that get men and women, super feminists and douchebag guys, or old and young people into fights. It’s another one of those issues that’s trying to play both sides of the argument. Continue reading

GMIM: House parties, my dysfunctional brain, and beer

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Zachapalooza recap and lessons learned

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Saturday was my birthday, or as I named it, Zachapalooza. I planned to have a house party about three months ago just so my college friends and others could plan ahead to actually attend. Mostly everyone came, everyone had fun, so on and so forth.

I tell you what though, it’s definitely the last house party I have for a while. It’s too much damn work and money to provide for a group of drunk idiots for only one night. All this effort gets put in and then you have to clean up the next morning (hungover most likely), pack away leftovers, and throw away the buns you left outside that the raccoons got to last night (that happened).

Let’s review some of highlights and low-lights: Continue reading

GMIM: White NFL cornerbacks

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

White sports writer writes story on white cornerbacks’ struggles as minorities in NFL…huh?

Last week, Sports Illustrated posted an article on the lack of white cornerbacks in the NFL. It doesn’t take a doctor to figure out the number of white guys playing cornerback ranges from extremely low to none existent, yet SI felt compelled to write a 5,000 word feature story on the few guys who have other the past several decades.

This piece, written by white guy Michael McKnight, is filled with some A+ head-scratching quotes. It starts by introducing Donny Lisowski, former NFL corner and Caucasian person, in Seahawks training camp making plays and getting hype and love from fellow corner Richard Sherman, who is not white. Continue reading

GMIM: Coffee, Hockey, and Steve

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Starbucks vs Me

Yesterday morning, I get into the office a little early. First and foremost, early in the office on a Sunday is the working man’s move. Early bird gets the worm, but the hawk eats the little bird. Or something like that.

Anywho, I figured I’d stop at the Starbucks downstairs to grab some morning caffeine to get my Sunday started. It’s been out for a little, but the Unicorn Frappuccino advertisement was just staring at me from the behind the counter and figured “why not?” I’ll give it a try, see what the buzz is about.

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So I head up and ask for one of these cups of fairy vomit and I’m told, “Sorry, we’re out of the stuff needed for it.” Understandable. These stupid things have been flying off the shelves left and right. The Starbucks back home had a sign saying the Unicorns had gone extinct. So with that, I get the usual Venti Caramel Macchiato.

I get to the office, sit down, and a co-worker asks if anyone wants anything from the ‘Bucks. Only 10 minutes later, he comes up with a hot coffee and a UNICORN FRAPPUCCINO, the exact drink they “didn’t have the ingredients for.” Continue reading

GMIM: Patriots Day

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

The Marathon Monday All-‘Murica Team

Here in Massachusetts, we observe the third Monday of April as a state holiday called Patriots Day. It’s a good old time, especially if you’re a college student along the Boston Marathon route getting drunk at 8 a.m.  You know, responsible actions that’ll land you a job a few months later after graduation.

The Boston Marathon isn’t the Super Bowl or World Cup, but it’s a feel-good day for Bostonians to celebrate the state that invented America. It could be argued that the marathon itself is an analogy of the American Dream: a group of individuals from nations across the globe pushing their own limits to reach their goals and celebrate all that is good with the land of the free.

On this day every year as well, the Boston Red Sox play their 11 a.m. Patriots Day game. It is truly a perfect day drinking experience for sports-goers. But while watching this game, a couple of my favorite pitchers came in to toss the ol’ leather for Boston. Why are they my favorite? Athletic ability? Personal story? Morals? No, it’s none of those. These players’ physical appearances embody what it means to be overly American. They look like true ‘Muricans: overweight, un-groomed, and free living manly men. We’ll get to them later.

Without further delay, here is the All-‘Murican Patriots Day Team (Note, this is cross-sport and does not have any true structure. You know, the ‘Murican way): Continue reading

GMIM: Easter is Coming

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

My long-lasting feud with the Easter Bunny

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It’s Easter week, folks. Palm Sunday was yesterday, which means the state of Florida was lit. Lent technically ends on Thursday, Good Friday comes the day after, and then Easter finally arrives Sunday. Big, big week for all the Catholics out there.

I enjoy the food, helping kids hunt for plastic eggs filled with money or terrible Tootsie Rolls, coloring boiled eggs I’ll never eat, and dressing like a private school nerd. But for me, Easter is a reminder of my arch nemesis: The Easter Bunny. I admit, this might be one of the more ridiculous things I’ll put out there, but I assure you this is 100% true. This isn’t my sarcastic hot fire flames takes, my condescending analysis, or any other blog I put out there to grab a few laughs. This actually happened and I will stand by it as long as I live. Continue reading

GMIM: Baseball is back!

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Baseball is back!

The recent snow here in New England makes it hard to believe, but baseball is officially back. The the time of year I binge through opening day(s) games, watch the Red Sox religiously for about two weeks, and then check in once in a while until the end of August. A pattern much like going to the gym.

Yesterday’s game went from boring (Yankees falling to the Rays in a snoozer), to good (Madison Bumgarner hitting two home runs), to pretty good (Cardinals take down the World Champs). A nice three-game slate on Sunday, reminiscent of the NFL season. But why in the world are the Cubs opening on the road and not playing at home for a full week? Regardless of how soon the schedules are made, the World Series champions should open the season at home every year.

I won’t give predictions or in depth analysis, because I’m not a smart person. I am however keeping an eye on the following: Continue reading

GMIM: Cities suck, naps are great, and don’t talk to strangers

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

City living is garbage

Yes, this is Chinese smog, I know.

Growing up 30 miles north of Boston, I always had a fascination with the city. I grew up in the suburbs with a large yard and plenty of street parking. There weren’t any woods, but I could smell the boarder of New Hampshire. It’s the ideal location; far enough from the city to have peace, but close enough to drive in for the day.

So when I started working in the city, I was excited for what was to come: tall buildings, restaurants, endless numbers of people walking around, trains, cars, and close proximity to the harbor. I was looking forward to being immersed in what I would hopefully at some point call home.

Well, you can count me out on the crap known as city living. Don’t get me wrong, Boston is probably my favorite city, but I have ZERO interest living here or spending more than eight hours in my job’s area. Continue reading

GMIM: Bracket update, names, and… a new podcast?!?

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Zach’s coin flip bracket update

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If you read last week’s blog, you would know I have filled out my annual coin flip March Madness bracket. Here are some notes so far after the first weekend before we get into the Sweet 16: Continue reading

GMIM: March Madness

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Zach’s Coin Flip Selection Special

Ah, the sweet smell of March Madness. If I wasn’t reminded what month it is, I would’ve guessed it was still January. The temperature has been in single digits and we’re receiving over a foot of snow tomorrow. Thank god, because I really didn’t enjoy the few days we had when it was 70 degrees.

Regardless of mother nature’s plans, it won’t change the fact we have the best month in college sports and that’s the NCAA basketball national championship. It’s truly a joyous time to watch 18-22 year-old student-athletes work volunteer their hardest to contribute to the NCAA’s success and wealth without any earning a dime.

Before the clock struck 9, I already filled out four separate brackets. But there’s one bracket that matters most: the coin flip. Yes, this truly innovative and original idea started a few years ago when yours truly was starting out in the blog game and had maybe two readers at best (my mother and I). So without further ado, here are the results of the flips: Continue reading

GMIM: Phones, Meals, and Automobiles

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Little housekeeping news for the Monday blog: I won’t be numbering them any more. Yes, riveting news, I know. Now back to the blog…

Nokia to bring back the 3310

It’s been news for a bit now, but the Finnish phone company is bringing back the iconic 3310.

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In a time where 90’s and early 2000’s nostalgia is gaining popularity, from movie and TV show reboots to horrible fashion, the time machine has finally picked up cell phones on it’s trip back to the future. Continue reading

GMIM #19: Mr. Oscar had quite the night

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Let’s talk about last night

When I masterfully created the concept of Good mourning, it’s Monday!, my vision was to write blogs that either distracted you, the reader, from your miserable day at work with either funny stories or my own misery you could relate to. I’ve ranted about the subway (won’t stop), I’ll be sure to write stories of my production to this planet (it’s not much), and we’ll be there together for all the screw ups in my life and others.

A massive screw up headlined the Academy Awards last night, but a big screw up was overshadowed. It puts the “mourning” in Good mourning, it’s Monday! Continue reading

GMIM #18: 50 Shades Darker review

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Am I a miserable person for wanting the subway voice to be miserable in the morning?

As I do every morning heading to work, I hopped on the subway and rode the mobile hunk of metal like a sardine traveling to the supermarket in a vacuumed-packed can on board an 18-wheeler. I’m tired, I’m struggling to keep my eyes open, and I want to sleep; everyone around me is the same way. But it happens that one person is alive and well: the subway driver. Now, I do always hope the driver is awake, that way we don’t crash and burn (although that doesn’t seem like a bad idea on some days), but I cannot handle an overly joyous driver who goes over the intercom to lighten up our mornings.

“GOOOOOOD morning passengers and welcome aboard the Orange Line! Our next stop is Haymarket. There you will find city hall, Faneuil Hall, and the harbor. We thank you for riding the T and wish you a splendid day!”

My reaction: Continue reading

GMIM # 17: I hate snow

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

I hate snow. I hate winter. This sucks.

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I’ve spent most of the winter shoveling snow with an old shovel because my snowblower was “broken.” Turns out, a small tube was detached and I could’ve saved my back from pain and suffering for two months. Continue reading

GMIM #16: The New England Patriots are Super Bowl Champs

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Today is a Pedialyte day, folks. The clock and sun say it’s the afternoon, but my body is telling me the day has just begun. So, good morning to you, reader. Continue reading

GMIM #15: Super Bowl picks

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Super Bowl LI

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We sit six days away from what companies without rights call “The Big Game” and folks, it should be a doozie. As I’ve stated previously, I’m no football expert. I’m just your average shlub sitting in the office, writing for an audience of 16 people at best. So my opinion does not matter. Regardless, you’ll read it anyway and wonder, “geeze, who is Zach picking for the Super Bowl?” Well, allow me to dive right into the swimming pool of hot takes and uneducated predictions. Continue reading

GMIM #14: Patriots and Falcons are on to Houston

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Super Bowl LI is set, and it should be a good one

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My scores may have been off, but my picks were correct for who would be playing in two weeks. It’ll be Patriots and Falcons in Houston for the 51st Super Bowl. I didn’t get to watch much of the Falcons game since I was at the Patriots (no big deal), but after watching the recap, they made the Packers look silly. Just plain domination for 60 minutes. Continue reading

GMIM #13 MLK Day

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

MLK Day, and Inauguration is four days away

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GMIM #12 Back to reality

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Back to reality; back to work

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Vacation is over, Christmas is long gone, and it’s a New Year. Yup, I’m back in the office again plugging away and earning(?) my paycheck. Of course it was single digit temperatures on my commute this morning, so that was a fantastic way to start Monday. But I’m here, and I guess that’s all that matters, or so I’m told. Continue reading

GMIM #11 Live from Chicago

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Ah yes, the Monday observed because New Year’s Day was on a Sunday. If you’re lucky, you’re not working. If you’re not so lucky, you just served me a gingerbread latte at the hotel lobby Starbucks.

What’s that you ask? A hotel? Why yes, I am currently writing this in the home of a certain Coach Mike Ditka. I came out to Chicago with the lady for a wedding and the city does not disappoint. I actually got to watch the Pats from a Boston bar north of downtown, so that was cool. Continue reading

GMIM#10: Christmas Hangover

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

T’was the morning after Christmas, and all through the house. Not a creature was awake, not even……. I can’t think of a tacky poem for today. I’m not hungover, but sleepy as always on a Monday. Hope everyone enjoyed Christmas and is ready for reality once again. Enjoy the blog to make you forget about Mondays.

Top 5 Songs with the Saxophone

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Writer makes something up; people take it as breaking news

I’m scrolling through the Twitter machine mid-day and I see this tweet come up from Time:

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First off, didn’t the movies/books end in 2007? Why is a decade-old supporting character from Harry Potter relevant? But more importantly, how is this news? J.K. Rowling created these characters, worlds, and stories for the entertainment of others. The details of this FICTIONAL story will always remain FICTIONAL and imaginary. Rowling went on her Twitter page to share this incredible news to her fans. She’s “revealed” in the past that Dumbledore was gay and Hagrid couldn’t produce a Patronus…whatever that means. Continue reading

GMIM#9: Holiday Edition

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Steve Burns Finally Confirms Why He Left Blue’s Clues

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Source: So was a music career the real reason Steve left “Blue’s Clues”?

“That’s actually not true,” Burns told [The Huffington Post]. “No, no, no, no. People think I left the show to pursue a music career. That didn’t happen at all.”

Burns confirmed that getting older ― and, yes, losing his hair ― had a lot to do with his decision. Continue reading

Good mourning, it’s Monday! Number 8

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Robin Williams and Tupac arrested in Arizona with 114 pounds of pot

Source: PAYSON, Ariz. – Suspects by the names Robin Williams and Tupac were arrested with more than 100 pounds of marijuana during a traffic stop near Payson Sunday. Albuquerque residents Robin Williams, 21, Tupac Crum, 19, and Erick Harris Jr., 22, were all arrested and booked into the Gila County jail on drug charges. The marijuana inside had a street value of about $69,000, according to Arizona DPS.

Before we get to the obvious, I’ve always found it bananas how much pot people are able to obtain. They had a chubby child amount of the devil’s lettuce that was going for a total of 69 (nice) thousand bucks. But they had it sitting in the bed of a white Chevy pickup like true amateurs would. Take a lesson from TV or literally anywhere to know that you have to stash the herb in secret spot. Seat cushions, in the roof, or even just under the seat. Learn young I suppose and do better next time? Okay, on to the mugshots… Continue reading

Do women poop at work? An investigation

While sitting in my personal 12 x 10 office, I pondered an important issue that I believe needs to addressed: do women poop at work? I can say that most men, especially those paid hourly, take their sweet time on the porcelain throne. But even in my adult years, I still think about this issue and it’s bothersome. It’s time we solve one of the great mysteries of life. Let’s text some ladies in my phone… Continue reading

Good mourning, it’s Monday! Week 7

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

Canadian woman, 96, becomes a great-great-great grandmother

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CAROLINE WAGNER/CBC

Source: (BBC) At the age of 96, Vera Sommerfeld has just become a great-great-great-grandmother. Baby Callie, born in October, is the newest addition to a family with six living generations of women. Continue reading

Good mourning, it’s Monday! #Six

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

‘ALL I ASKED FOR WAS SLICED CHEESE’: RICHARD ROOMMATES BEWILDERED AFTER STORE EMPLOYEES HIDE, CALL THE POLICE

Source: RICHMOND, Va. (WRIC) — What began as a spontaneous trip to the store ended up being one of the most bizarre experiences of Ricky Berry’s life. He and his roommate went to purchase a grocery item and ended up having the police called on them.

Berry and his roommate told 8News they walked into the CVS in Carytown and asked an employee if they sold sliced cheese. The worker kindly replied that they did not.

A few minutes later, the employee — all of the store employees, in fact — were nowhere to be found. Berry and his roommate, Philip Blackwell, said they were in the store with another customer for more than 30 minutes alone before an officer with the Richmond Police Department showed up. Continue reading

Good mourning, it’s Monday! Number 5

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

TOP STORY: MAN GETS CAUGHT IN RAIN, GETS HOME THREE HOURS LATER (IT WAS ME) Continue reading

Good mourning, it’s Monday! #4

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

DAVE CHAPPELLE HOSTS SNL

If you didn’t catch Saturday Night Live, you missed a great one. Dave Chappelle made his return to the comedy spotlight and killed it. Here’s his opening stand-up monologue: Continue reading

Hey there, America. Let’s talk.

Well, you got what you wanted. As I type this, Hillary Clinton leads the popular vote, so maybe we didn’t get what we wanted. But who knows.

Donald J. Trump, come January 20, 2017, will become the 45th President of the United States. My fingers hurt typing that sentence. It’s bananaland, Bizzaro world, ass-backwards, and simply incredible. The electoral college elected an unqualified man to run the most powerful country on earth. I can’t wrap my head around it. It’s like America saw Brexit and said, “I can one-up you guys.”

I wrote on Monday a plea to America (a.k.a. my seven readers) not to vote for Trump. It wasn’t until election day morning to realize who Trump really was: the 70-year-old male version of Kim Kardashian. Let’s explore… Continue reading

Good mourning, it’s Monday! 3-peat

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

CAN’T UNDERSTAND? NEED AN ANGLE FOR A STORY OR SHOW IDEA? THINGS GOING WRONG? ANSWER: MILLENNIALS!

Because why the hell not? This is something that has been bothering me for a good amount of time and I can’t avoid it. Even the term drives me crazy: millennial. The trend of highlighting young adults of this decade for better or worse has been red-hot as of late. It’s in the news, blogs, podcasts, radio stations, and even TV shows. Let’s start with every old person’s favorite station, CBS: Continue reading

Good mourning, it’s Monday! Halloween Edition

Welcome to another installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! This weekly blog looks to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through your first day back at work (unless you don’t work). Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy…

FIRST THING’S FIRST: HAPPY HALLOWEEN Continue reading

Good mourning, it’s Monday! Week 1

Welcome to the first installment of Good mourning, it’s Monday! It’s been some time since I’ve consistently written and I’d like to get back to it. I’ll look to cover various topics in the news, along with personal stories or encounters from the past week at home and work to help you through the first day back at work. Hopefully my seven followers like this and share this to make it eight. Enjoy… Continue reading

In good standing: converting Major League Baseball to a point system

In early November, long time baseball writer and current radio personality Tony Massarotti spoke on his show “Felger and Mazz” on 98.5 The Sports Hub in Boston about his concerns relating to the future of baseball. Massarotti joined the Boston Herald in 1989 and covered the Boston Red Sox from 1994 through 2008. He’s been a contributor to The Boston Globe since 2008 and is a member of the Baseball Writers Association of America. Although Massarotti has been around the game for over two decades, he recognizes that a change might be necessary to keep fans interested. Major League Baseball implemented pace of play rules this season to help shed minutes off lengthy games, but perhaps it’s not just the length of games that’s making baseball fans like Massarotti turned off by the sport. He explained:

“I think baseball needs a radical overhaul to make the regular season more meaningful. When I say more meaningful I mean in the short term — adding another playoff team doesn’t do a whole hell of a lot to make a Wednesday night game against Houston more watchable… and I like baseball.”

Massarotti said it hit him when watching Game 7 of the World Series between the San Francisco Giants and Kansas City Royals. The game had so much on the line; the fate of the series onto those final nine innings. MLB divides its seasons into series, but what meaning do these series have? If a team picks up a couple wins and drops one, it’s simply on to the next one.

The plan proposed by Massarotti was this: why not give each regular season series some true meaning? His idea was a point system, much like the National Hockey League has for its regular season (two points for a win, one point for an overtime/shootout loss, and no points for a regulation loss). Admitting he was “thinking out loud,” Massoratti proposed a three-game series win would result in three points and a sweep as five points.

Mazz brought this idea up recently on his show “The Baseball Reporters,” which also airs on 98.5 The Sports Hub, and it had me thinking: how would last season’s standings look if a point system was in place? Continue reading

THE DEFINITIVE WINTER BREAK SPORTS VIDEO GAME LIST

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With Christmas and New Years long gone, the rest of winter break drags until spring semester’s start. It’s a time of hibernation, hiding from the bitter cold outdoors, and a whole lot of nothing for a month. It’s in this month off from college where important goals can be set and achieved… in video games. In this post, we look at the definitive sports games to play over winter break. These games span over different platforms, years, and sports. One game for each sport. Continue reading